The Sound of Silence

Have you noticed that a significant part of our culture is removing or discouraging pauses and silences? The incessant messaging, busyness and noise means many of us get caught up in this way of life without even realizing it.

What are some signs that this is going on? One way to notice the impact our culture is having on us is to look at ourselves. What are your thoughts on communication? For example, do you feel the need to reply to a message immediately? How does it make you feel? Do you expect the same response from others? How do you feel about idleness or stillness? Do you feel guilt or shame? Perhaps a fear of being judged?

When we fear silence, or being alone with ourself, it's difficult to grow, heal and be healthy. To see the importance of stillness, all we need to do is observe nature. There is a cycle of seasons for all of life. Nothing exists purely in one phase. We all move through times of accelerating change, celebration, loss and decline, as well as rest. Pausing is a part of life. Some may even say it's where treasures reside. After all, we're not in a race to the grave.

When pausing is discouraged (e.g. notice how certain sites have no natural end, designed to keep you scrolling and scrolling...), we learn to be reactive. Life becomes one knee-jerk reply after another. What would happen if, instead of reacting, we responded?

Responding is intentional. It isn't an immediate action emerging from fear. Rather, it's taking a moment or more to stop before taking action. A pause. Ideally, while we pause, we centre ourself. A common way to do so includes taking a few deep breaths and focusing on each inhale and exhale. (It helps to make our exhale longer than our inhale.) We may also place our attention on the general life force within our body. Some people meditate. Some write down the thoughts cluttering their mind onto paper.

In the book, Man's Search for Meaning, Viktor Frankl writes about his experience in a concentration camp. He came to the realization that, when everything was taken from him, he was left with something: the freedom of choice. He knew that no one could take from him his ability to choose how to respond, to pay attention to that moment right before responding, to own his attitude about any situation.

Likewise, Rumi, the 13th-century Islamic scholar, poet and Sufi mystic, came to the same discovery. This wisdom has traveled centuries across the globe and isn't unique to any one belief system. This is likely why Rumi's poetry reads as relevant today and is so widely quoted. When we hit on truth, it pierces through any apparent markers that separate us. Perhaps this is why great music and humour that stems from reality unites so many of us from different backgrounds and experiences. Anyone remember what an international sensation Mr. Bean was? Talk about the power of silence.

We all have the ability to train our minds as we train our bodies. We can choose to insert pauses into moments throughout our day. We can take a mini-break from the noise and give ourselves the gift of peace, even if it’s counted in seconds. Doing so grants us the ability to truly take in the many beautiful details of a winter's day: steam rising up from a cup of coffee, snowflakes gently floating down from the sky, a small cluster of red berries clinging to an otherwise bare branch, and looking up to discover a bright blue sky framed by glistening tree tops dusted with powdered snow.

Do you enjoy total silence? Do you like to work or play with music on in the background? Music without lyrics? Or perhaps you prefer the soft gurgling sound of water running over stones in a babbling brook? Do you enjoy nature sounds alone or with an instrumental accompaniment? We all have our preferences, and some of us enjoy it all. See our reverie section for a few options that reflect the moods of wintertime.